Yes yes, you’ve heard about it. For those who have not, here is a ctrlC ctrlV of the news.

……bizarre images have emerged showing a mystery female figure walking down a hill on the arid planet.

The photo of what looks like a naked woman with her arm outstretched was among several taken on the red planet and sent back to Earth by NASA’s Mars explorer Spirit, the ‘Daily Mail’ reported on Wednesday, citing an unnamed website.
Though no official confirmation has come from NASA whether the figure is an alien or an optical illusion caused by a landscape on Mars, it has set the Internet abuzz that there really is life on Mars.
As one enthusiast put it on the website, “These pictures are amazing. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw what appears to be a naked alien running around on Mars.”

Here is the picture if you haven’t seen it already

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if we Zoom Barabar Zoom Barabar Zooo ooo ooo ooom, this is what we get
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A Shadow? A Rock? A Woman? Your guess is as good as mine.

Who is this woman? And what is she doing there on Mars all alone? Is she the only one? If so, is she the last or the first? Could she be the equivalent of the grand old African lady we all ‘sprang-off’ from? Or is she the ‘last woman sitting’ at the end of a largely successful civilization that has reached the end of its product life-cycle?

It might be more than coincidence that the little robot with a cam that went on the surface of Mars and roamed about clicking these mad pictures was called Spirit. Wonder if it was Vodka, considering this is the red-planet…

But in all the reports that are seen on-line, almost all mention the fact that the woman was nude. Just what do they expect from an unsuspecting Martian victim of Earthly paparazzi? Versace jackets and Gucci accessories? Do they expect her to dress up for the Spirit photo-shoot?

Perhaps she was just cleverly trying to catch the attention of Hugh Hefner?

All said and done, you can’t deny there is a sense of mystery and intrigue in this picture. It gives us a lot to think about.

The woman was possibly initiating herself into Sannyasa in that desolate open ground on the red planet. Or one or more of these –

  1. She is actually a very stressed female of the Homo sapiens from planet Earth, who wandered onto Mars looking for a little ‘space’
  2. She has put some pappadoms and applams out to dry under the sun and is shooing the flies away.
  3. She just left home and is about to meet a man from the motor trade with whom she’s about to elope.
  4. She is waiting for her man who, as you might expect any man to be, is  late , and that’s why she seems to be looking at her watch with great impatience.
  5. She is practicing the tadka on an imaginary kadai of hot bubbling dal
  6. She is actually a statue. She was very wronged by the ruler of the planet and so did something like Kannagi did and burnt the whole planet down. Everyone died except a very inspired sculptor. That explains the figure, that explains why there is no life currently.
  7. She is Lady Liberty of Mars. This was the port of entry when there was life long ago.
  8. This is a woman getting ready for a party. She is about to spray deo in her armpits. Oblivious NASA scientists are analysing an ‘unexplained mist’ seen in a picture taken moments after this one. She did go to the party later. And Cris De Burg happened to know this. 
  9. This figure is a female rapper, and she is doing her dance move when the picture was taken.”Yo!”
  10. This is a Martian nudist camp and she is applying sunscreen lotion.
  11. She was in love with a soldier who went to war years ago promising he will return to the same rock where they had met first. Ever since she goes there everyday to look for his return.
  12. She is feeding grains to pigeons.
  13. This she is not a she, but a he. And since Veerappan has been located and shot, this very likely is a much wanted terrorist in hiding.
  14. This is the screen test for an Ekta Kapoor soap about a banished Bahu whose dowry cheque bounced.
  15. This is the Lyril girl sitting in frustration because she just can’t find a desolate jungle in the middle of nowhere with a waterfall to take a refreshing shower.
  16. She may not be alone. Take a look at that picture again. She is pointing to something. Or someone.
killbill.jpg

Yes, do you see that? She just beat the shit out of him and flung him away. Which might prove that culturally there may not be much difference from how things are here on the earth.

What is your take? Who could she be. And what could she possibly be doing?

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