Glad tidings, everybody.
I have good news. But before that, a word from our sponsors.
This blog has, over the past several months that it has been around, brought unmatched joy and incredible delight to its loyal readers. The fan following number has only been steadily increasing from what it was early last year and the only way has been up*.
Readers of this blog swear loyalty and are in fact willing to beat up and even kill those people who write better blogs. First give this blog from our state the recognition it deserves, they say. They swear not to allow new blogs, especially those from other states. There is also some talk about asking for quotas. They are even going to ask for a bill of reservation to be passed. Or so the Santa Cruz West wing of the fan club reports.
Ha. The clowns. What do they know. There can be no one from the state which this blog comes. For though we’ve heard of Andaman & Nicobar, there is no state in India to the best of my knowledge by the name Madness & Chaos, is there?
In any case, point I am trying to make is that old mechanical typewriters are difficult to swallow. A nice glass of sherbet is any day better. Just as much as Juhu Beach is salty. But nothing can match that nice wall painting across the moon.
That’s right. There is no point.
I love my readers cuz they find my humor delectable. In case you are new to this blog, my humour, is the kind of humour that calls for a very refined taste and an acute sense of perception to the finer things in life. Typically, smart people tend to find my humour humorous. What? Did you just say you don’t find that funny? Oh, I know what that means, it means th…what? you just realized you find it humorous? oh good. I thought so.
Anyway, as I was saying, smart people find my humour humorous. Which explains why all of my readers are smart. I read my blog posts the most, incidentally. And a lot of people have always said I was very smart. One of them was of course, my mom. The rest of them was a lady who was in fact my aayah when I was around 3 or 4. I dont remember her. My dad apparently had insisted on sacking her after he realized she was a compulsive liar too old to be an aayah.
But seriously. I love my readers. You can say something stupid and they see something deep and philosophical. You say something deep and philosophical and they go into raptures of laughter. What a sense of humor hahaha. I love Pathe, they say.
But then again thats the way it works I guess. Like back then many years ago, a man tripped and fell on his head. And the fall was so bad his head started spinning. Thats when he, Copernicus, saw the world spinning and then immediately ran to the Church to tell them his new theory. All they did was laugh at him and ridicule him. Soon his head stopped spinning as he recovered from his fall and he stopped caring about his own theory.
I felt rather like him right till a little while ago. I saw the world spinning. No one else did. I am fine now though. I think.
Let me explain – BiggBoss Season 2 is finally over. Ashutosh Kaushik is the winner. Let us all clap and get the hell back to our lives and hope we recover soon.
Before you think I am a deviant species, let me tell you frankly that I hated the show. The concept is warped. I think I may finally have the answer to making a super mega-hit reality show. I will put a stone in a cage and shoot it for 3 months and beam it prime-time into the homes of 3 million unsuspecting idiots. If they are not busy going crazy in Big Bazaar and buying things they have no clue about or use for, they can watch the show. And it sure is going to be a super-hit. I will have every news channel cover it like it was some world event and juxtapose it with APARTHEID ENDS. Or some such other microscopically more significant news.
Great. Thank you very much. Now, can I Please change the channel?????
Would you believe this?? Bigg Boss even has a site! You have no idea how the great Shilpa Jetty affects me. Its worse than Rupa Baniyan. (And you can look that up if you even care).
Many of us have been going through a rather silent, rapidly affecting sickness. If you have sensed a difference in me by now, there is a good chance it is because of this affliction. For, I am one of those unfortunate souls that’s been infected. It is not quite a disease. More of an affliction. It takes over your immune system slowly and silently and before you know it, it has taken control over your body, mind and soul. And you realize too late that you are a victim yourself and it is going to be very difficult to reverse the situation.
Over the last several weeks, I have been silently suffering. And now that the good news is out, I feel like a free man who can tell the world his story. Let me take more joy by saying, “Bigg Boss season 2 is finally over!”
Allow me to milk it some more. “Guys! Bigg Boss season 2 is finally over!!!!”
How many times has it happened to you that your friend(s) or people at home high-jack the TV to watch a specific program and you have to submit passively and join them. First it’s for a few minutes. Then a few more. One episode, then two and before you know it, you have been sucked into it because you were too passive and to lazy to take a stand. And thats precisely how I got sucked into this infernal, otiose ‘reality’ show.
But hey, guess what? BiggBoss season 2 is finally over!! Really, really over!
*Of course. That’s the only direction – for, the number in question early last year was 1 (guess who?).
